Asking for guidance

[PIG3ON]

Hello all,

I have wandered across this site for about a year and a half at the time of me writing this. I feel I learn more each day but I never reach a true answer or epiphany. I understand its about the journey and not necessarily the destination and I'm willing to continue treading through this site even if I never find an answer. However, I've been trying to walk the footsteps from those before me, including the WhiteRabbit with his usage of the evokation. I've been trying to prepare myself for about 2 months to properly perform the evokation. My birthday will be the 9th of May (crazy coincidence, I know) and it feels like the perfect day to finally follow through. However, a couple of days ago I had a strange dream. I dreampt of a man who I became acquainted with. He was a practicing witch and truthseeker. He preformed a ritual that went horribly wrong. Everyone close to me warned me to not end up like him and to turn back. When I woke up, I immediately thought of the evokation. Was the dream supposed to be a warning for me? Or was it just a manifestation of my inner fears? I have come to this forum looking for any advice I may receive. I myself am a truthseeker with a burning curiosity, but also understand there are some things I'm not supposed to understand. This site has been a weird but helpful mentor in my journey and I desperately want to understand it to the fullest extent, even with the possibility of consequences. However, this dream has made me doubt myself and whether or not I'm ready. I'm unsure of which direction I need to go next. I know there are some fantastical people lurking on this forum, are any willing to help?

[packajos000]

Bird Man The Great,

The "Evocation" cometh not from without but from within alone.

And words art naught without the Thoughts which do bring them forth; follow the Thoughts, sir; rituals art only symbols to help one, they art nothing and nothing more than like music to accompany meditation,

Notwithstanding!: the "Evocation", Friend, is symbolic in itself and its messages. Isis is not a mere Egyptian Goddess, methinketh... Yes... Many characters and events of the same cryptography.

Look within to that which composeth Thee and that which composeth those compositions--infinitely, eternally, endless makings of forms making forms.

How I do Love and Cherish Thee...

--Packajos